How to return a husband's interest in yourself: advice from a psychologist
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Surely, in the yard of almost any high-rise building you can meet a pleasant elderly couple. Grandmother and grandfather walking hand in hand. Grandfather plucks a sprig of lilac for his beloved woman, and grandmother, sitting on a bench, takes out freshly baked pies from a dilapidated bag. This is not so much cute as it is already incomprehensible to young people. How, - young girls ask themselves, - how did they manage to live together for so many years? How did this elderly, wizened grandmother manage to keep her husband's interest in her for so many years? In the modern world of temptations and easy accessibility, it is very difficult to interest a man, and if this man has already become a husband and you have been together for more than three years, then shout out the guard. Let's figure out how to understand that the husband has lost interest in his wife, what could be the reasons for the cooling, how to return the husband's former interest and how to maintain this family warmth.
The man lost interest in his wife. How to deal with relationships.
So, how to understand that a husband is losing interest in his beloved woman? In general, women are very emotional creatures, they tend to exaggerate, listening to their inner voice and intuition. Most often, they do not cheat, and the spouse can immediately notice something was wrong. What should a woman pay attention to first of all ... Probably, what immediately catches the eye. For example, earlier you and your spouse could talk for hours sitting over a cup of tea, or you could walk for hours in the park near the house, maybe your spouse used to regularly write a note with kind words in the morning and leave it on the bedside table before leaving for work.
And this, what you are used to and without which your man is not your man, has disappeared. This is indeed a wake-up call. How else can chilling appear in a relationship? Reducing the time of communication, isolation of the spouse, refusal to make contact, lack of physical intimacy and not only in an intimate way (lack of kisses, hugs, strokes), frank requests not to touch him for a while. Unfortunately, many are faced with similar behavior of the second half. But do not immediately panic, you need to soberly assess the situation. Fatigue, problems at work, physical ailment. Wait a bit, and only then proceed to.
Consider the sad scenario: your husband does not get tired at work, there are no problems with health or work activity - he is simply no longer interested in you. It is not necessary to fall into depression, as it often happens, but it is still necessary to understand the situation and look for the reasons for cooling. Of course, the quickest and easiest way is a regular heart-to-heart conversation, but sometimes a man is so closed in himself that he can’t even get out the words. Then step back for a while and analyze the situation. What could offend him and push him away from you? What has been said in a fit of anger or done lately that could turn an established trusting relationship on its head? What caused the loss of interest and how can it be corrected?
The main reasons for the loss of a spouse's interest in his soulmate, and how to regain the interest of a loved one.
Most often, the main reasons are distrust and, accordingly, constant monitoring. A man by nature is a free animal and keeping him in a cage will not work anyway. If you managed to tame a wild animal, give it warmth, peace and love, then it will not want to leave you. You don’t need to impose yourself and remind yourself too often, it’s important to let a man miss his home during the time spent at work or with friends. At the request of your husband, try to let him go to friends for football on Friday evening, without indignation, with a smile, let him go. In most cases, a man will either stay at home or leave, but in an hour he will be lying in his own bed and watching a comedy with his “such an understanding and kind wife.” Remember the period when you did not live together yet and existed in those minutes when you were away from each other, counting the seconds before the meeting. The man was free, but at the same time he always wanted to be near you. Try to return to this candy-bouquet period again, play, remember these pleasant sensations.
It is easy for a man to lose interest in a woman who is always dissatisfied with everything or constantly complains about her life. It is only in the movies that several amazing men will suffer and fight for the location of one whiny lady, who has absolutely everything bad. In life, men are attracted to sunny women, next to whom you can warm up. Such women become real friends in life and can always support, next to such women you want to be a man and do only the best for her, because she deserves this best. Therefore, if you suddenly notice that you regularly began to cut your husband with or without a reason, then you should think about it. Men only on the outside are so strong and strong, in their souls they are easily hurt, and your discontent can greatly shake the ego. If you are not satisfied with what a man does for you, then what is the point of trying? It's not far from depression.
A woman needs to remain an airy delicate flower in the hands of her man, delicately solve problems, while not placing the burden of responsibility on her fragile shoulders. A man must remain a man. One of my friends, already a grandmother, told me about her secret. She always had strong hands and without her husband, when he was on business trips, she could easily open any jar with one hand, but with her husband her hands became a “pair of swans” that could not do anything at all. Her husband not only hurried to help and open all the banks, but also looked for various openers at the time of his absence, so that only the woman he loved would not feel abandoned. This is a very important point. Let a man be a man, even if you can nail a shelf better than him.
It is extremely difficult to live with a woman who is not interested in anything other than her relationship with her husband. You don’t need to lock yourself in on your husband, trying to re-educate him (she should have been doing this) or, on the contrary, live with him, his hobbies, interests, aspirations, forgetting about yourself. No wonder there is an expression: "opposites attract." Your man needs to receive third-party information in order to relax, take a break from work and business. He will tell a little about how his day went, you will share with him your impressions about the book you read, or how your day went and what you learned from the TV show, tell about the events in the life of your mutual friends or relatives. That is, live this time without getting hung up on a phone call and thoughts about how your husband spends this day without you. Live the full life of a self-sufficient person.
Sometimes it happens that a spouse, under the yoke of homework, constant fatigue and lack of sleep, loses her attractiveness. Home, everyday life, cooking, ironing, cleaning, laundry, children ... And it’s not even always possible to wash your hair. In the morning, such a woman jumps up, makes a tight bun on her head, pulls on the first sweatpants she comes across, a T-shirt in which it is not scary to wash the floors. And all day, like a squirrel in a wheel. And such a miracle in feathers meets a tired man from work. Women love with their ears and men with their eyes. This must be remembered. No matter how difficult it is, but you need to take care of yourself precisely in order to please your loved one. A fitness center will save you from shortcomings that could appear after childbirth, a beauty salon every 2 months and experienced craftsmen will help restore a healthy shine to your hair, a well-groomed look to your nails, etc. If you don’t want to spend money on all these enhancements, you can always watch video tutorials on the Internet and find something suitable.
From the foregoing, the following conclusions can be drawn. It doesn't take much to get your husband's interest back and keep him. It is enough to be yourself, the way your future spouse loved you, you should not mope and often complain about life, you do not need to limit your husband in freedom and lock yourself up on him. Be an interesting, beautiful and positive woman, next to whom you want to fall asleep and wake up. Be a friend, a lover when necessary, a mother, and of course a wife to your beloved man.
Returning to the very beginning of this article, to how, after all, older people carry through the years awe and respect for each other, I would like to quote one of these truly worthy men: “Before, broken things were repaired, not thrown away, and with relationships , anything can happen, but it is much easier to help each other, lend a shoulder, rather than move away and throw a person out of your life.
